Tag Archives: society

“Huge”

Today, I came to understand how difficult it is to be a woman.

I have came to know and understand what body shaming is recently when some co-worker mentioned that I am “huge”. It just made me feel so embarrassed as this was made in front of a few people. And while I understand what happened, I did not expect it to come from that person and I did not know how to react to it. He informally apologized while he was walking down the lobby and  I just made a comment “no worries”. No worries? Why? I could have shouted and screamed at him for taking that offence on me! But I did not. I just said “no worries”.

I came home feeling distraught and shocked. Mixed emotions of pity, confusion and perhaps, I blamed myself for not fighting back. I asked a few questions to myself, like, “Should I loose weight?”, “Am I really that fat?”, “I should really stop eating dinner”.

I do not understand how our society is only conformed to one standard alone. That is the “24 inch” body and anything beyond that figure is a hippopotamus. Why can’t we live up to the fact that each women, whatever shape they have, should never be subjected to shameful comments like this. Why can’t men understand that we, are already hard on ourselves. That we wake up everyday thinking what to wear, how to put our make up on and how to walk, not because for ourselves but for the people around us. To please the eyes of the people that wants these qualities. You see written articles like “How  To Get Men to Like You”, is written by a retard whose first rule is to “always exercise to get that beautiful body”. We clearly live in the world where women needs to be thinner to be accepted.

And I cannot blame myself for not making an immediate, appropriate and defensive reaction. Because, no one, NO ONE should have made  that comment in the first place. No one should make you feel that you are not enough.

As a woman, it is not your fault and it will never be.

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Are you addicted?

My fingers flexing. My neck hurts. All this emotion running through me like I have finally faced my fear.

I cannot believe I spent three hours. Completely unproductive and drawn towards the luxury of time. No matter what I do, I just can’t stop. My hands seem to have a world of it’s own. Like, instantly, I come home from work and the first thing I do — is check my Facebook.

It is so frustrating how I have come to this point in my life where I cannot live a day without checking it. Like, my life depended on it. And how, I can’t stop thinking on how to tell the world what I am doing on daily basis. It seemed like I was getting dumber and lazier and self absorbed by the day.

And I knew right there that I used Facebook to fill in a missing piece. I realized, I wanted complete validation and recognition. Something I am fulfilled of every time someone hits the like button on every posts and every information I share. And it is scary because you keep on wanting more of it and as any other human being, you aren’t satisfied. So you try your best, to put out a facade of happy face and wonderful  sceneries to gain more likes and follows. I do not mean I am living in a lie but, I sometimes wonder the purpose of it and then I reflect that this is sometimes a waste of time.

It is as if, this is the same struggle for younger generations. Instead of initiating change and making a world a better place, half of our time is spent on impressing other people. Worst of it all, physical interactions have begun to diminish over time. The lack of genuine and sincere connection is sometimes disturbing because you do not really know, if they mean what they say; if there is an understanding on both parties; if you really did read that article you shared or you just simply shared it without understanding — without knowing if it is real or reliable.

Any information shared is always treated as a weapon as it changes perception. And by far, we have come to that era where the truth is not verified anymore. We no longer understand the difference between opinion and news. And I see people not really knowing that they have already shared damaging news that are made to change the views of the public eye with lies.

However, I woke up and I realize that our society is evolving so much that, you may never be able to stop using it. That sooner or later, to connect with people, you would have no choice but to use it as it does great wonders when used effectively too. It could even improve your way of life.

There is more to life than checking statuses on  a news feed or posting selfies. You can live without it!

 

Understanding Introverts

Almost everyone knows that there are two types of people. The extroverts and the introverts. The extroverts, being gullible and has no problem dealing with people. They are the ones who can start and end conversations without being awkward and are “likeable”.  The introverts, on the other hand, holds everything opposite to this.

But do people really understand how introverts behave and is our society open to the fact that, there are a lot of people who choose not to go out on social functions and would rather curl up in bed with a good book?

We have always been taught that people who have succeeded in life are the ones who are eager to leave the house and network with other people. In school, we were taught that you have to socialize otherwise, they would think you are a lunatic who is planning on something sinister. If you are quiet, everyone sees you as weak or weird or that she has her “own world”.

J.K Rowling, before her famous books were released, thought of Harry Potter in a bus ride in England. She was so reserved that she was shy enough to borrow a pen when her ideas were conceived.

Bill Gates would not have been successful if he did not spend hours and hours in his computer. So did Mark Zuckerberg, Founder of Facebbok, who was described by Sheryl Sandberg as “shy and introverted” and “does not seem very warm to people”.

This to name a few people, who are not ideally relatable to others but has been successful in changing the world with their ideas that were born out of moments when everyone thinks, they’re aloof and crazy.

I think this is one of the reasons why Hillary Clinton lost in the recent US Elections. She was not relatable to the media and to the electorate. Everytime she spoke, even if it made sense, she could not connect to her viewers and that it felt like it was too scripted. But, her being an introvert contributed to that. And, unfortunately, most people did not fully understand that.

My contention is that society, at this point, should be more open to the fact that introverts can be successful. And that, they are sane individuals who just prefer to spend more time alone not because they’re psychologically damaged but because they are just like that.